Friday, October 4, 2019

So long, farewell....

It's time for me to go. I've been putting my thoughts on the bible out into the ether for about five years now. It started out as an antidote to my religious conditioning and an outlet for things I wish I could say out loud. At that time, I was a closeted atheist attending a church of christ. My husband was the only person in the world who knew I was an atheist and he was not happy about it. I was more than a little afraid for my future, having been socialized to believe I would be shunned and abandoned if anyone ever knew what I actually thought about god, the bible, and religion.

 I kept this blog anonymous and unfunded, even though it kept me in the no man's land of the Google algorithm, because I didn't want it to affect my personal life in any way. I didn't care how many viewers I got, but have been pleasantly surprised throughout the years. My blog's map shows me I've had readers from every continent. (Hello, to my regular visitors) However, I never received any comments on my actual content. Just a bit of spam now and then. That's okay. It actually made me less self conscious and willing to ramble on.

My life and the world have changed over the last five years. I feel that I have covered everything I needed and wanted to discuss about the bible in this blog. I'm no longer attending church and have no plans to ever go back. I have friends and family members who know I am an atheist and have not abandoned me. However, I still feel the need to exercise caution when speaking about religion. My husband is still not happy about it, but he pretends it is a non-existent issue. My fear is not as great as it once was, but my sorrow has increased a hundred fold. I have lost someone very dear to me.

Because of my loss, I have had to make some monumental life changes and mental shifts. My psyche has been in emotional turmoil for over six months. I really should find a therapist that I can work with, one who won't "bimble off into woo woo land." I've shed a lot of former activities and associations, clearing my way for a future that is still a mystery to me. I have plans to finish my education and do a little travelling. I also want to move away from an area which has not been good for my mental health. In the spirit of trying new things to see what sticks, I bought myself a ukulele.

Existential angst is a powerful thing. I suspect embracing it might be easier and healthier than resisting. We'll see. In the meantime, the earth has been well watered with my tears. Life is strange. I can wake up in the morning and appreciate the beauty of my world, hear the laughter of people I love, and even laugh a little myself. Yet still I walk around with a broken heart and the certain knowledge that we are all but space dust. The universe and time care nothing for my tears.

To my friends and family, should you ever find this blog: I have been as honest in these pages as I know how to be. If anything I have written gives you pain or sorrow, know that it was not my intent. I was writing what I saw as true at the time.

To my children, should you ever find this blog: I love you dearly, more than words can tell.

Rest in peace my dear one.

AG


Esther part twelve and wrap up.

We are now at chapter nine. The year went by and it is now the thirteenth day of the twelfth month, the month of Adar. The Jews assembled in all the cities waiting to attack those who would try to destroy them. Many of the non Jews were afraid of them. The nobles and officials decide to side with the Jews because Mordecai had become very powerful and influential. The Jews used swords to kill their enemies, destroying five hundred men in the citadel of Susa alone. They also killed Haman's ten sons, but they did not lay hands on the plunder. This is again a reference to the time Saul was to completely destroy the Agagites and not take plunder. Saul broke the rules. Mordecai, his supposed descendent didn't. It was redemption.

The king heard about the destruction in Susa and the death of Haman's sons. He asked Esther if there was anything else she wanted. Esther requested that the Jews in Susa be allowed to continue protecting themselves the next day as well. She also wanted  Haman's sons to be hung on gallows. The king agreed. The next day, the fourteenth of Adar, three hundred more men were killed by the Jews in Susa. But the plunder was not taken.

On the fifteenth of Adar, the Jews rested "and made it a day of feasting and joy." The author says this is why rural Jews celebrate this event on the fourteenth of Adar and the Jews of Susa presumably celebrate on the fifteenth. It became day of joy and feasting and for giving presents to each other. Mordecai sent letters throughout the empire giving instructions about how in the future they were to celebrate those  days that the Jews were saved from their enemies. The Jews agreed that they and their descendents  would uphold this celebration the same two days every year. It was called Purim, because Haman had cast lots to find out what day would be good for the Jews destruction. A lot was called the "pur." That is where the word Purim is supposed to have come from.

We are now at chapter ten. King Xerxes required tribute from his entire empire, "to its distant shores," which would have included Jerusalem, Israel, and Palestine. Every thing he did, and the full account of Mordecai's greatness, are supposed to have been written in the annals of the kings of Media and Persia. Too bad we don't have those records. We do have Herodotus' account of Xerxes' exploits and they do not contain any information about Mordecai or Esther. Nothing outside the bible does. Mordecai the Jew was supposedly second in command to Xerxes and held in high esteem by all the Jews. That's a pretty big deal, if it is true. However, that suspiciously similar to Joseph's relationship to Pharaoh in the book of Genesis. Plus, Neither Mordecai or Esther are mentioned anywhere else in the bible.

This book was written by an unknown author. It does not mention any other Old Testament characters, places, or events. It does not mention Yahweh, or any of his commandments. It does not mention any uniquely Jewish religious or cultural practises or beliefs. It does not claim to be the inspired word of a god. It seems to merely serve as an explanation for the celebration of Purim. It is my considered opinion that the celebration had some other less exalted explanation and this story was derived to give the holiday legitimacy. I could be wrong about that. However, the holiday seems to be used as a good reason to have a party with a lot of alcohol.

Herodotus tells us that Xerxes wife Amestris (Vashti?), when she was old, "made return for her her own life to the god who is said to be beneath the earth by burying twice seven children of Persians who were men of renown." In other words, she tried to get immortality by sacrificing fourteen children. Nice lady. Xerxes was assassinated about 465 BCE, after reigning about 21 years.

Esther part eleven

We are now at chapter seven. The king and Haman are dining with Esther and the king again asks Esther what he can do for her. With a great deal of dignity, Esther asks the king to spare her people from annihilation. She adds that she wouldn't have bothered him if they were just be sold into slavery.  The king wanted to know who would dare to do such a thing and the queen said, "The adversary and enemy is this vile Haman." I don't know if it is intentional, but "the adversary" has been used as a term for the devil.

Haman was naturally terrified. The king was enraged and went out into the garden, probably to gain control of his temper. Haman stayed behind to beg Esther for his life. He knew that the king was furious enough to execute him. Just as Haman was dramatically falling on Esther in humility, the king walked back in. He immediately suspected Haman of trying to molest her. Haman was held prisoner and a eunuch in attendance informed the king of the gallows Haman had built for Mordecai. The king order Haman to be hung on it.

We are now at chapter eight. Xerxes gave Esther all Haman's property. She told the king Mordecai was her relative and the king gave Mordecai the signet ring that Haman had once worn. Esther put Mordecai in charge of Haman's estate. She also begged the king with many tears to rescind Haman's plan to execute the Jews. The king said another decree could be written in behalf of the Jews, in the king's name and sealed with his signet ring. However, the previous decree could not be rescinded because it too was sealed by the king's signet ring, and "a document written in the king's name and sealed with his ring, could not be revoked. "

It is now the twenty third day of the month of Sivan, the third month of the year. Mordecai comes up with a new document that will counteract the effects of the old. He has it translated into all the necessary languages, he seals it with the king's ring and sends copies out to all parts of the empire by special couriers. These couriers may have used the famous Persian Royal Road.

What did the king's (Mordecai's) new edict say? It gave the Jews the right to assemble, to protect themselves, and to kill anyone who might try to kill them. They were also allowed to plunder the property of their enemies. The day appointed for all this was the same day that Haman had declared to be when the Jews should be attacked, the 13th day of the twelfth month. Copies of this edict were made known throughout the land. Everyone was to know that the Jews would be ready to face their attackers, with the king's permission. The city of Susa was also informed and greatly rejoiced. There must have been a lot of Jews living there. Mordecai now had royal robes and a large crown. There was a lot of feasting and celebrating throughout the provinces. Some non Jews decided it was a good time to become Jewish.

Till next time.

Esther part ten.

We are now at Esther chapter five. It is the third day of the Jew's fasting for Esther. Esther puts on her royal robes and goes to seek an audience with the king. The king sees her and extends his royal scepter. Esther goes to him. The king calls her "Queen Esther" and says he will grant her anything, up to half the kingdom. This is also what Herod promises his wife's daughter in Mark 6:23. First, we already know it is highly unlikely Esther was the Queen. Second, I wonder if anyone ever called a king's bluff and asked for  half a kingdom. (I'm guessing that is a purely fictional trope.)

Esther chooses to ask the king if he and Haman will come to a banquet she has prepared that day. (Notice the contrast to the fast Esther has just been on)The king sends for Haman and they go to Esther's banquet. The king is pretty sure Esther hasn't actually asked for what she wants yet. While they are drinking wine, he asks her again what he can give her. She asks that the king and Haman come back to another banquet the next day.

Haman was pleased as punch with the mark of the queen's favor. However, when he went out of the king's gate and saw that Mordecai would still not show him physical signs of respect, he was furious. He didn't do anything to Mordecai, but went home and bragged to his wife and friends about his current exalted position and the fact that he got to attend the queen's banquet. Then he complained about Mordecai being the one thing that irritated him. His wife and friends had a solution: build a gallows 75 feet high, then ask the king for permission to hang Mordecai on it. Haman gleefully decided to carry out this proposal. Seventy five feet is about as tall as a seven story building. My commentary suggests it is either an exaggeration or the gallows was built on top of the city wall. I vote for exaggeration.

We are now at chapter six. The night after Esther's banquet, the king has insomnia. He orders the book of the record of his reign to be read to him. While the record is read, the king hears the story of how Mordecai foiled the plot of the king's assassination. He asked what had been done to reward Mordecai and the answer is nothing. By that time, Haman had come back to work and was getting ready to ask the king for permission to hang Mordecai on the gallows he had built. Wow. That was fast. Haman had a 75 foot gallows built over night.

Haman is told to come into the presence of the king. The king asks Haman a hypothetical question, "What should be done for the man the king delights to honor." Ooh, boy. Haman is sure the king is talking about him! Who else could it be? Haman proceeds to describe his own fantasy about being honored. He wants to wear a royal robe that the king has worn, and ride on a horse the king has ridden. The horse is to have a royal crest on its head and is to be led through the streets by one of the noble princes who would be proclaiming, "This is what is being done for the man the king delights to honor."

The king loves this idea and tells Haman to do everything single he suggested.....for Mordecai. The tables have turned. So Haman himself had to lead Mordecai through the streets proclaiming, "This is what is done for the man the king delights to honor." That must have stung. Afterward, Haman ran home in shame to tell his wife and friends what happened. They tried to console him by reminding him that Mordecai was a Jew and all the Jews were going to be destroyed any way. Then Haman had to hurry off to attend the next banquet being given by Esther for Haman and the king. The

Till next time.

Wednesday, October 2, 2019

Esther part nine

We are at the end of chapter three. The edict to destroy the Jews on the thirteenth day of the twelfth month, of the twelfth year if Xerxes reign, has been sent out. "The king and Haman sat down to drink, but the city of Susa was bewildered."

When Mordecai found out about the edict, he went into mourning. He tore his clothes, wore sackcloth and ashes, and wailed loudly. Jews throughout the empire did the same thing, including fasting. What was this supposed to accomplish? 1 Kings 21:27-28, shows us an example of king Ahab doing this to show humility before god, so that god will change his mind about destroying him. In Genesis 37:34, Jacob mourns his son while in sackcloth. My commentary suggests the  author of Esther may have been familiar with Joel 2:12-17, Which suggests that mourning behavior can cause god to relent from sending calamity. There are also many instances of fasting, often as a sign if repentence.

While Mordecai was thus attired, he was not allowed to enter through the king's gate. Esther heard about Mordecai through her maids and eunuchs. She sent him some other clothes, but he would not wear them. Esther sent one of her eunuchs out to find out what the problem was. Mordecai told the eunuch the whole story and gave him a copy of the edict. The eunuch went back to Esther and reported what Mordecai had told him, along with a request for Esther to go into the king's presence and plead for the lives of her people.

Esther sent the eunuch back to Mordecai with a message. Everyone knew that to go into the presence of the king without being summoned was a risky enterprise. They could be put to death, unless the king extended his gold scepter. Plus, Esther had not been called to go to the king for a month. Mordecai sent a message back to Esther.   "Do not think that because you are in the king's house you alone of all the Jews will escape. For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to this royal position for such a time as this?" This is the main theme of the whole story.

God is not mentioned at all, but Mordecai expects salvation for at least some of the Jews, if not for him and Esther. From whence cometh this salvation? Is hope in this salvation justified? Even today, after over 2,5000 years, there is a firm belief that there will always be a remnant of the Jewish god's chosen people on earth. Many Christians consider themselves part of that category.

Note: My bible commentary says that the other "place" where salvation arrives from may be a play on words, one of the names of god being "the place."

Next, Esther sends her message back to Mordecai. She wants him to gather up all the Jews in Susa and have them conduct a fast on her behalf, for three days and three nights. (Hmmm. That's a familiar time span.) Esther and her maids will also fast. After that she will go take her chances with the king. "Mordecai went away and carried out all of Esther's instructions."

Notice the contrast between the fasting and acts of humility and service of Esther and Mordecai and the extravagance and feasting of the royal household.


Tuesday, October 1, 2019

Esther and Herodotus part eight

We are at chapter three, verse 2. It is about the the beginning of the twelfth year of Xerxes' reign, a little more than four years after he supposedly made Esther Queen. Haman has been exalted by the king, who has commanded that all the royal officials at the king's gate kneel down to Haman. Mordecai dies not kneel down or pay Haman honor. Why? Who knows. Maybe because he's supposed to be an Agagite, an hereditary enemy of the Israelites. However, though it makes for a good story, it's highly unlikely that was actually the case. Five hundred years had passed since the alleged enmity between the two tribes. Even if it actually happened, what are the chances that level of disdain would travel that far through the centuries, maintaining its fervor?

The royal officials wanted to know why Mordecai would not comply. He did not answer or change his behavior. The officials told Haman to see what he would do about it, as well as revealing to Haman that Mordecai was a Jew. Haman was hopping mad. When he found out who Mordecai's people were, he decided to kill the lot of them throughout the whole kingdom.

It was the first month (Nisan) of the twelfth year of Xerxes's reign. Haman cast lots to see when would be a good time to kill all the Jews. The lot fell on the twelfth month, the last month (Adar) of the year. Haman went to Xerxes and told him "there is a certain people dispersed and scattered among the peoples. In all the provinces of your kingdom whose customs are different from those of all other people and who do not obey the king's laws. It is not in the king's interest to tolerate them. If it pleases the king, let a decree be issued to destroy them, and I will put ten thousand talents of silver into the royal treasury for the men who carry out this business.

 Haman is offering to pay for the extermination of the Jews if the king will sign off on it. He doesn't appear to tell the king who he is going to exterminate, though. The king gives Haman his royal ring, which basically gives him the power to do almost anything. Xerxes also tells him to forget about the money, Haman is allowed to do whatever he wants to the people. If this story was true, Xerxes was an idiot. He gave Haman carte blanche to destroy a bunch of people in his kingdom, without even asking any questions?!!

On the thirteenth day of the first month, Haman had the royal scribed write out his orders in the various languages of the empire and had them sent out by couriers to all the king's provinces. The orders were written in the name of Xerxes and sealed with his ring. They said that "all the Jews, young and old, women and children," were to be killed on the thirteenth day of the twelfth month. Permission was also given to plunder the goods of the Jews. Extra copies of the edict were issued and sent out so that all the non-official peoples of every tribe would also be ready to attack the Jews.

It probably wasn't a coincidence that the day the author says this declaration was written, the thirteenth of Nisan, was the day before the Fast of the first born and two days before the Jewish Passover week. Another interesting coincidence is that in Persia/Iran, the thirteenth day of the first month was an annual celebration called Sizdeh Be-dar. This day is traditionally around the American date of April first or second and has been a day to play pranks, since before the time our story takes place! The Jews were also to be killed on the thirteen day of the last month. Thirteen certainly looked like an unlucky number for them.

Till next time.

Sunday, September 29, 2019

Esther and Herodotus part seven

We are at Esther 2:11. Esther has undergone a year of intensive beauty treatments. It was her turn to get deflowered go to the king. She had permission to take whatever she wanted, but limited herself to what the head eunuch suggested. This made her very likable. "She was taken to King Xerxes in the royal residence in the tenth month, in the month of Tebeth, in the seventh year of his reign." That was in the winter, somewhere around 479 BCE, at least four years after the banquet in chapter one.

The text tells us the king was highly attracted to Esther and liked her better than all the other virgins he sampled. "So he set a royal crown on her head and made her queen instead of Vashti." If this story is about the historical king of Persia, Xerxes, and his actual queen, Amestris, the last statement is a blatant falsehood. It is historically unbelievable that this king should have take a woman of unknown origin and make her his queen in place of the mother of his heirs, just because she made a good impression in the bedroom. Not only that, Amestris was obviously a wickedly jealous woman, if Herodotus is to be believed.

Next, the king gave a great banquet, "Esther's banquet." He invited all the nobles and officials and gave out presents. Did he ask the new queen to show up at the banquet when everyone was drunk? It doesn't say.

Verse 19 is rather odd. It says, "when the virgins were assembled a second time, Mordecai was sitting at the king's gate." So, the king chose his new queen but kept rounding up virgins any way. Why was Mordecai sitting at the king's gate? The text has only said that he has been concerned about Esther's fate. By now, she's been in the royal compound for over a year. I'm pretty sure the implication is that he has found some occupation there. Perhaps as a scribe or other servant. The text goes on to say that from his position at the gate, Mordecai continues to give Esther instructions, and she continues to follow them. Plus, at Mordecai's command, she still has not told anyone she is a Hebrew,

While Mordecai was still sitting at the king's gate. He happened to discover a plot to kill the king. Mordecai relayed the news to Esther who reported it to the king, The report was "investigated and found to be true." The conspirators were hanged and the event was written in the king's records.

We are now at chapter three. Some time has passed between chapters two and three, possibly up to five years, as we will see. Enter the villain, Haman the Agagite. We are told that the king elevated him and gave "him a seat of honor higher than that of all the other nobles." It may not be obvious, but  the author is having a little fun with words here. Way back in Chronicles, all the Agagites were supposedly destroyed during the reign of Saul. How  could Haman be an Agagite at least 500 years later? Back in the day, Agag was a king whose downfall by the Israelites was allegedly predicted in Numbers 24:7, "Their king will be greater than Agag; their kingdom will be exalted." The name Agag meant "high." It has the connotation of great or exalted. Numbers was playing off that meaning to say that Agag may be high, but Israel would be higher. This prediction is supposed to have come true with the destruction of Agag and his kingdom in Chronicles.

So, when the author of Esther called Haman an Agagite, he is basically saying that Haman may look high and mighty now, but he's cruising for a fall. And at the hands of a possible descendant of Saul no less.

Till next time.